How To Deal With People Who Accuse You

Have you ever been accused of something? Someone says something about you that is not true, or is attacking your character? Typically during these times, these accusers are usually speaking about you behind your back, or to your family, or to your neighbors or friends.

We've all been there. Someone says something about us, or attacks us directly. It usually happens in a setting that catches you by surprise in such a way that you not prepared for the attack, and therefore, not prepared in how to respond.

I'm not talking about the normal everyday questions that come from employers or spouses in regards to your whereabouts or productivity. I'm speaking more specifically about character assassination and attempts at discrediting your person in the public arena. It may happen in your workplace, neighborhood or organization.

These accusers usually possess these traits-

1. They feel justified in their attack because they believe that they are 'helping people out' by defaming someones character. ("Everyone else should know what I know")

2. They gain a certain satisfaction from attacking people either with or without cause. ("I sure showed them")

3. Typically they have been attacked in the past and are now lashing out at someone else to vindicate a past hurt. ("Now someone else knows how I felt")

4. They act on limited information and misconstrue the motives of the person being attacked. ("That person deserves this!")

I think at some level we've all probably attack someone at some point in our lives, but when it happens to us, it really feels different. That should prompt two actions in our own personalities. We should first, realize that attacking someones character or motives hurts that person, and secondly, not attack people.

It brings up the question? How do we respond to those accusers? Do we lash out at them? Do we attack them? Do we find fault in them so as to discredit their character?

There's a small story in the Bible about Jesus being accused that at times comforts me in regards to personal attacks-

Mark 15:3-5 The chief priests accused him of many things. So again Pilate asked him, "Aren't you going to answer? See how many things they are accusing you of." But Jesus still made no reply, and Pilate was amazed.

Sometimes, the greatest defense of an accuser is to say absolutely nothing.

Here's the deal- if you believe in God, and believe that He knows everything that is going on, you have to believe that God will defend you. He will bring the truth to light and vindicate you. When you remain silent, and allow the Lord to do the defending, it allows Him to work things out in such a way that is better than anything that you could have done yourself.

So what's the short nugget for the day? When people attack you, be quiet and let God work it out.

Be blessed
matt