Friday, May 14, 2010

One Way To Improve Relationships

We were at someones house last night. My daughter had an event at school, and afterwards, we went to see some friends who were having a quasi-bbq. We ended up sitting around the fire and talking a bit.
I love sitting around a fire talking. There is something magical about the flames that seems to get people to open up  a bit. I'm not sure if its because of the darkness, the smoke, or the flicker of the flames, but people do open up more around a fire.
As we were talking, we started to discuss relationships and how difficult they are. If you're human, you probably agree that they are difficult. Its not easy being in relationship with people. Sometimes its downright difficult. Its hard to be in relationship.
One of the reasons that it is so hard to be in relationship, and something that hinders them most is vulnerability. People do not like to be vulnerable with their thoughts and feelings, and that is why it is really hard for some people to be in relationship.
What do I mean? Vulnerability is opening up about what you truly want, need and think. Its being willing to 'put yourself out there' and share what you are truly feeling. Its not bottling up. Its not holding back. Its being willing to open up who you are to the other person and risk being hurt. Clearly, most people struggle with this.
Its hard to tell another person that your feelings have been hurt. Its painful to let someone know that you have an emotional need that isn't being met. Its daunting to think about explaining your past to someone so they can understand who you are today.
Vulnerability pays the bills in relationships. If you don't pay it, bankrupt relations will be your payment in return.
Ask yourself- how vulnerable are you with those whom I want to be in relationship with?
What's the nugget? Be willing to be vulnerable. Be willing to be honest and open up to people. Yes it will be hard. Yes you will be hurt. But here's what will happen, in the process you will find that there are people out there that actually care about you. People who can handle raw emotions and aren't afraid of being real. People who will love you for who you are.
God never intended for us to be anything less than authentic. He desires it for us. In our relationships with others, and especially with Him. He wants us to be open and vulnerable with Him most of all.
Be open. Be vulnerable.
Be Blessed

Posted via email from Faith and Victory Church Blog

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