Relationships are tough work. If you're married, ever have been, or have a relationship with another human being, you know what I'm talking about. Getting along with our fellow man, and attempting to have a meaningful relationship with them is difficult.
Its not hard being in a relationship with me though, because I'm perfect. I rarely say or do anything wrong. I give more than I take. I consciously look for ways to meet other peoples needs before my own. That's why most of the problems I have in relationships are with the other person. They are the person who needs to change. Its their fault that our relationship isn't going well. If everyone would just think and act like me, this world would be a better place.
Sound familiar? Obviously I'm joking and trying to make a point, but that's really how people think about their relationships. They think its always the other persons fault, and never their own.
Here's a nugget that will help you in your relationships today- when faced with a problem in your relationships, always look inside before looking outside. Think to yourself, "what role do I have to play in this" and "what could I be doing better".
Of course there are situations in which this will not work that well because the other person may truly be the issue, but for most relationships, its usually a two way street.
God made us relational people, for what reason, I am not sure, but He did. The Bible says to love your neighbor as yourself, and I think that's pretty good advice. Most people have the loving themselves down. They just need to learn to love other people with that same sort of love.
Be willing to change. Be willing to grow. Take some responsibility for your own actions.
Be blessed!
Pastor Matt
Excellant advise. Many relationships fail because one side sees where things are going, extrapolates this out to a certain point in time and figures "I'm not sticking around for that train wreck!". But I say "You can't extrapolate human behavior". People are thinking, caring, loving, fragile, insecure, creative creatures. And most will change for the good if you allow them the space and provide them a nurturing environment to do so.
ReplyDeleteRelationships can be complex; however, we can do our part and make them less complicated. Sometimes it requires us to think before we speak. We also need to stay positive in a bad situation. After all we ambassadors for Christ, how would he act or what would he say. We also have to remember time is short & we should never take the people in our lives for granted. This is my word for today.
ReplyDeleteDani
You know it wasn't until just a few months ago that I finally realized that my marriage isn't just about "me" and my needs or wants. Since then things have been a lot better. These are good words Matt.
ReplyDeleteRemembering I am a hard woman to live with is one of the smartest things I *try* to do every single day.
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